Thursday, May 14, 2009

finally.... after almost a month

"so i have not had the time to blog for the last few weeks. exams and whatnot...."

that is what I would have said if I had updated like 3 weeks ago, but it has been almost a month. I am now in the middle of an increasingly annoying job hunt. (something that can be pretty soul crushing if you let it.) I have not really been making art for a few weeks. I have taken some photographs here and there, but nothing (until yesterday) that has any direction.

brooke and I shot in our new basement for the first time last night. It was a little strange because we were shooting something with me as the model; I am not sure if I like being the model of other peoples shoots. I do not know why, but it seems to feel a lot more vain than when I shoot myself.... now i know that does not make any sense. i should probably feel more vain if i am shooting myself, but somehow being alone with the camera allows me to get past that.

in a few weeks brooke starts grad school. it is already pretty weird to have all this free time. (well, fee if you dont count looking at craigslist every 5 mins) i now am going to have a lot of free time to myself that i can use to create art, or maybe make this blog into something useful. (or nap and watch re-runs on the simpsons online... lets hope for the art one)

here is one photo from the first shoot of the summer. hope this is the beginning of something good :)

Tuesday, May 5, 2009

automatic writing? first try

caffine does not always make me feel like i am more awake. but sometimes i jsut feel that i have mroe caffine in me than i need to feel awake. i do not want to feel awake right now . sllep feels more real to me that the world does sometime. why is it that caffinene makes the world feel so strnage. is it something in the coffee or within me? I always edit, no matter what it is that i am doing. i try nto to edit, but sometime it is just the method that makes me edit.and sometime sit is more of a gut reaaction to the stymulas that is at hand. i am trying to write what i feel not what i think i think what i think is some tiems what i do not wn to feel.

coffee makes typeing hard, and so does automatic typing

day...

carve...
ride...
home...
plug...
sleep...
wake...
snooze...snooze...snooze...snooze...snooze...
wake...
write...
waste...
write...
done...
late...
ride...
critique...
finally...
hunger...
late...
meet...
food...
move...
write...
waste...
write...
elaborate...
leave...
cook...
short...
store...
bike...
Ben...
home...
cook...
finish...
photoclub...
potluck...
El Topo...
confused...
tired...
goodbye...
coffee...
caffeine...
write...
blog...

bye...

Tuesday, April 21, 2009

April 9th


I have decided to change this project a little bit. I have really enjoyed taking photographs everyday, it forces me to have to carry my camera everywhere I go. when I have my camera with me I take pictures. and when I take pictures I grow as a photographer.

the change comes in when I have been taking the pictures. I have noticed that I am not always in the most interesting places at noon, and what I am doing at noon does not always tell anything about my day (like when I dont get up till 2pm). So I have decided to make my daily picture about whatever makes my day interesting.

what made april 9th interesting? we poured bronze. it was a really cool process. watching pounds of liquid bronze pour into a fragile ceramic mold is pretty strange. watching the pour team work was like watching a choreographed dance. and in the end my bronze came out pretty great. Ill post photos later

Sunday, April 19, 2009

apr08NOON


today was NOT a very good day!

it was one of those days that you feel like everything comes crashing down at once and the weight might just take you with it. I felt very locked in place with no place to go.

for all of both of our flaws (ALL of them) I am relieved that I have someone that I know I can rely on what shit goes down. I know I am not perfect in any sense and I am glad that you can understand and love me anyway

noon: apr07



didnt get out of bed until like 11:30... shower by like 12. not much else happened today. it is strange not having to be anywhere till like 2pm. it has been nice. but next semester I am going to have a MUCH more full schedule. On top of a 21 credit semester I am going to have one of those classes as an independent study. so that means I am going to have to be REALLY on task like 100% of the time.

It HAS been nice to have so much free time this term (12 credits). but I work a LOT better when I dont have free time to lay around and be lazy. so lets hope that I can deal with it all

noon: apr06



more sushi! but I am just about out of money so I am not going to be able to buy any for awhile. so I am going to have to make this one last... I dont ever really want a lot of money, but I would really like to be at the point where I have to worry about buying a $4 thing of sushi.

I feel like it might just people the people that I surround myself with, but is it possible that we are a generation that does not want to huge house with a large SUV and everything handed to us? I want to work for my money and enjoy my life for that reason.....

does anyone else feel this way?